Onward, Upward, and Further In

My algorithm brings to me a lot of anger and hatred. I am thankful that I’ve searched for enough positive material that most of what comes to me comes from Christian sources. I am not as exposed to the worst vitriol on the internet. However, our world is incredibly polarised. This means I am not fully spared the quarrels and fights out there, because much of those quarrels and fights are within the Christian space. The anger and grievance of polarisation is beginning to get to all of us. And it’s contagious. So contagious that we begin to think this is normal and even righteous. Meek was once a word we celebrated in Christian circles, but now more and more of us despise it. I am away on vacation, and I retreated into the book of James. I was starving for some wisdom. The book of James is often considered the wisdom literature of the New Testament, with parallels to Old Testament books such as Proverbs. I was stopped short by James’ question: “Who is wise and understanding a...

I’m fighting a cold today. It’s not the worst. I’m achey, and my head hurts. In some ways, I feel sort of better on days when I’m fighting a cold. My immune system kicks in, and somehow, that immune response kicks out some of the other chronic pain I live with daily. It’s more the fear of whether the cold will turn into something really bad that can get to me. I’m trying not to be anxious. I’m also trying to pack for a bit of a vacation. It’s been five years since we have been on vacation. And I have a cold…. Finally, we get to go away, out of the city, and get a break, but who knows what this cold will turn into??? I used to get quite angry with God over things like this. Why me? Why can’t I just get a break? Everyone else around me seems to get several vacations a year, and they have the time of their lives! Why me? I never get a vacation from my pain, can’t I just have a vacation from the life I live in the city? But I’m coming to accept that my life will never be like...