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On Sanity:

A very important element to retaining a degree of sanity is being able to have an honest view of oneself. Especially in areas of sin. I can attest, the less I am willing to own my own sin, the more I lose grip on reality...and it bleeds out into many areas (not just the area of my sin).  

There's a problem though. Jeremiah 17:9 tells us that: "The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately sick; who can understand it?"

This means I am able to lose grip on reality VERY easily...because my heart is constantly deceiving me.  

What can I do? How can I know my sin? Jeremiah 17:10 helps us:" 'I the Lord search the heart and test the mind, to give every man according to his ways, according to the fruit of his deeds.' "

  • God will search me, and He WILL give to me according to the fruit of my deeds. However, I can attempt a futile effort at running from this searching until my days are done...or I can humbly ask God to search me and try me now...and show me any grievous way in me and lead me in the way everlasting (Psalm 130:24). I can entrust myself to God to convict me and show me my sins, and in so doing....I will have a better grip on reality.  
  • God works in mysterious ways, and He works in His own time. He doesn't always immediately show us our grievous ways. However, He WILL do so.  
  • Another thing that I have learned is that I am most likely to be blind to my own sin when I am being sinned against. I tend to zero in on the sin of the person who has harmed me, and this leads me to become blinder to the ways in which I might be sinning. I need God's grace even more during these times. Identifying my sin does NOT mean that it's ok for someone to sin against me. However, someone else's sin against me does NOT make it ok for me to sin.  
  • Thankfully, God is merciful and slow to anger. He deals graciously with His children. Learning more deeply about God's abundant grace has helped me to have more courage to seek His face, and ask Him to reveal my own grievous ways, my own sins to me. He is kind, and He knows my frame, that I am mere dust. He promises to remove my sin from me...as far as the east is from the west. I can safely entrust myself to God, and seek Him to help me to repent. The steadfast love of the Lord is from everlasting to everlasting on those who fear Him. And this, more than anything else, helps me to keep a grip on reality. Bless the Lord, O my soul. (referencing Psalm 103)

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